Serious Bleach Needed !!

Get this.................So I get a call from a cousin of mine tonight. Shelley, you are gonna hate me for this.....but here goes......What you gotta understand is that she works for one of the High Street big names as a hairdresser - and is quite highly regarded for her colouring. She has Aubyn hair. So, we chatting away, kinda making plans to connect now that I am on the outside ( She and her two kids and husband, Sam, live a good hour and a half by train out of London - real country area, but it does have a Sainsbury's ).......... So I say ' well how far from the station do you live ' coz I cannot get the 4 x 4 into a normal car. I am now calculating weather or not I could get myself there from the station. BOMB-SHELL......... She casually asks ' does your wheelchair run on PETROL ? ' Hello....................... Sam, you need to bleach her hair ! Urgently !

Brings back vivid memories of my dad trying to fire up the old fashion 2 stroke, petrol lawn mowers, by pulling furiously at those self-recoiling cords. Think that was when I first heard the " F " word. Have these visions of an old style church hall, stackable chair, placed on an ' easy mow ' 2 stroke lawn mower putting up the hill to Shell & Sam's place - a good comparison would be like flying on Easy Jet to Australia ( sub-economy class ) , as apposed to flying Quantas first class !!!!

No, Shelley.....we have electric chairs these days ! :)  :)

Pretty un-eventful day today. Made up my mind to clear the wads of mail stacked on the dining table. 11 months of paperwork, requiring answering and heavy explaining to Her Royal Majesties Revenue Services why my taxes are so late. Fines, penalties etc etc etc. Trying to do it on line was impossible - all forms PDF'd - Tried printing to manually fill them in, NO ink in printer etc etc....... Nightmare. All this with one hand !! You try opening an envelope with one hand - you WILL understand, trust me. Only solution - Give it to Jeeves 1 - Sort it ! I now have good knowledge of swear words in Romainian !

Jeeves 2 hovering around looking for anything to please me, really pissing on my battery as there is clearly only so much cleaning to be done ! Not complaining, he cooked an awesome chicken for diner, roast spuds and mouth watering roasted butternut. He is a Philopino lad, eager to please, and became a dad last week - YES, I viewed 150 pics on the Samsung tablet - cooing and aaaahhing about how cute the new born is,,,,,,, when in fact what I was thinking was..... It is so much easier, as Madonnas and Angelina did... Fly to Africa, scrape the fly's out of their eyes, pay a few bob, and leave with a ready made one ! Ambassadors they are - my ARSE !

So on that frank note people, I need some shut eye. As always, be thankful for what we have........ Health, wealth, sanity and good sense to be responsible for ones actions.

Go hug a tree !!!

Love ya

G