Sometimes, without even realising, we can get so caught up in the mundane essentials of everyday life, that our lives can unwittingly grind to a mish mash halt ! The daily trivia can become a huge looming monster ready to engulf all senses and basic practicalities of daily living !!
Well that is what happened to me last week. Between juggling carer shifts and beaker measurements of testosterone, mounting paperwork needing dealing with, tax deadlines - only too familiar as I am trying to convince the revenue services of a non-return as I was a mop in hospital ( Their last response being that the board needed to discuss my reasoning, even though I had doctors reports etc, etc ), more juggling of follow up sessions with various doctors from Stanmore, trying to get Dragon right in order to resume a working life................................... Then arrives a letter of attachment of household goods in lieu of a £1000 non payment of electricity bill from the tenant prior to me - this is after copious hours over the past few months trying to explain that I am the " new " tenant, and I have a new account with them !!!!
Brain malfunction ! Over-ride ! ......... I sit in the 4 x 4, looking out at the railway track and collection depot below me - wondering " what's next ". Doorbell rings, Jeeves answers, and I hear a lot of talking - I am summond by Jeeves to sort the problem. Well,........ It's a messenger of the court with an eviction notice for late council tax payments dating back prior to my injury.............. Lots of explaining that I am a new tenant et etc etc"......... ' The wheels on the bus, go round and round, round and round............ ' comes to mind, but in all reality the mind is thinking more along the morose sounds of Roy Orbison - those deathly depressing lyrics he wrote !
I return to the cheerie railway track and veg depot below to gather my wits ! Two choices comes to mind, and from over-load, to ' lets bang these all on the head ' and get on with life !! I cancel all medical trials I had agreed to in Stanmore ( requiring loads of time travelling to Alcatraz to be a guenie pig, ), I farm out the electrics, council tax debacle to the charity from whom I got the flat, i attack the tax returns.................... And suddenly, having achieved almost everything in one day, which has been mounting for weeks - I feel hugely proud of myself and can good order off to Alcatraz for my two week intensive top up of therapy with a clear mind !
So, I book the transport for Monday 10m. Semi packed and not quite finished with the morning regime, buzzer goes at 8:30, and ambulance has arrived for my transfer to medium section Alcatraz ! Just what I needed, but determined now, not to let minor issues cloud my new-found enthusiasm to life - pack, dress, and three Jeeves running behind me with odds and sods I might need. I Jeeves is accompaning me. The bitch driver, obviously peeved at having to wait, made sure she hit every bump and pothole in the road ! A ' pleasant ' trip to Alcatraz, with very mixed emotions of having to return. Wanting so hard to have huge expectations, but deep down knowing that it is a small step forward in this eternal road to recovery. Institution life again ! The food ! The noise, the .......everything !! I have really had enough of hospitals !
We turn into the dreary entrance to Alcatraz and an unbelievable sense of calm came over me. The derelict buildings, half baked roads, depressing unkept gardens, cluster of ambulance's to'ing and fro'ing inmates, ............. This is home for me for two weeks, this I CAN do, it is temporary, and I need to be more appreciative of having the chance of more therapy !! The roads become like velvet, the gardens like those in Babelon, and the buildings like a new development !!! I AM HERE AND I AM GOING TO GIVE IT MY BEST SHOT.
I am admitted to the same cell block, given a bigger cell than befor - two windows plus doors leading out to a weed infested patch of grass ( beautiful ). Plus I have a TV - never ceases to amaze me at how inconsiderate staff can be - no remote, I mean, how the hell is a cripple supposed to get out of bed and switch the bloody thing off ????? But, I also have a basin with both hot and cold water ! Big plus - mirror to high, I mean, why, in a cripple infested jailhouse would you put low access basins with normal head height mirrors ? Nice big closet, really spoilt,........... Hanger rail far too high to reach - I rest my case !! This is temporary !!!
The old familiar staff to greet me ! Loads of laughs and jokes. Mark-Adam, Mizz Hollywood Boulevard, all there as if I had never left. I am treated, and rightly so as an out-patient that's ' sleeping over '. My carer attends to most of my needs, and it is my responsibility to get to my scheduled therapy sessions. The Physio's and OT'S all greeted me like a long lost friend. Again, as I have said before, I cannot believe that this was ' home ' for me for all those months ! But, now I am vacationing in the country for two weeks, and I get to good order on parole this weekend ! Out on Friday afternoon, back on Monday !
As always, sent with love and ongoing good health wishes.
G.
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